I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
