I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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