Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize