Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
