I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
sex in a hospital.. check
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
