And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
