So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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