Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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