Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I would fuck him just for his dog
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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