At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
