It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
