I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
try to milk me bitch
Randomize