Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
