i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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