He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
