big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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