You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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