life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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