they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
