What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Randomize
