6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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