the new term for farting is butt boxing.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Randomize