but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
