i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
