remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
