Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
