Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Shame - the story of my life.
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