why didn't you poke me back
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize