I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize