Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Rumble strips road head = magical
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize