I'm really into asian looking animals
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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