I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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