what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize