I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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