I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
there's paper in my vomit.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
