I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
