On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
