I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
