it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
