Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
