Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize