The maid of honor just puked.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
