I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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