I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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