If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
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