I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I had to cum in my sink.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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