I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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