you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize