I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
