I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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