this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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